A Reader’s Thoughts About Nathan V.

I still don’t have time to write anything coherent (as evidenced by last night’s post) but I did want to share this email a reader sent in last week in response to my own post about Nathan Verlhelst. They said I could share it with you and I am going to because I think they make some really good points, especially a reminder that for a lot of trans people there remains an unmet need for GOOD therapy that helps people work through deeper obstacles in their life as opposed to the usual status quo of  simply cheerleading their gender decisions.

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A very moving post. I can’t speak from a trans experience, but I do want to share here that this is such a sad story of a bereft human being. From comments I read attributed to the mother, she was never loved as a girl, seen as monstrous from the moment of birth. I think in many way the tragedy began with the path to transition as a path of healing. Surgeons and psychopharmacologists are not the healers of such a deep self loathing and family abandonment. Nancy/Nathan was a tortured soul, given false hope of cure for this self hatred and extreme unhappiness in a transition that was mutilating and lead to the final tragedy.

State sponsored suicide seems to me different than euthanasia, and this is one of the elements that is so troubling about this. I don’t know how much therapy, good therapy, Nancy/Nathan chose and stayed with over the years. Maybe suicide would have been the outcome with or without transition. I do believe that therapy offers the chance to heal, to accept, to even experience a little love for self. It’s not always enough, but I think it’s the better way.

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Comments

  1. The Sceptic says

    I agree whole heartedly with the theme of this post that , “there remains an unmet need for GOOD therapy that helps people work through deeper obstacles in their life as opposed to the usual status quo of simply cheerleading their gender decisions. And…with the thoughts of the quoted reader: “Surgeons and psychopharmacologists are not the healers of such a deep self loathing and family abandonment. Nancy/Nathan was a tortured soul, given false hope of cure for this self hatred and extreme unhappiness in a transition that was mutilating and lead to the final tragedy”.

    Again. This brings us back to my original point. It is incumbent on the initial/ first encounter therapist to look beyond the self described issue of gender dysphoria. It is this caving to the default diagnosis of GD/GID that precludes that most important treatment of all those co-morbidities like OCD, low self esteem, etc., etc., etc.

Hi, diverse opinions are welcome here I just ask that comments be on topic. Also, if you are posting anonymously please know that sharing your opinions is more helpful to this site than sharing unverifiable life experience or identities